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What was your "I'm dating a fucking idiot" moment? One, when she said what kind of bird is a ham, was hard to ignore. Two, when he ran out of gas while in line at the Starbucks drive-through, right across the street from the gas station. I told him to get gas first because his car was low but he really needed that iced caramomakiato. I asked why he didn't listen to me, and he replied with, "I thought I could make it." He ended up pushing the car through the drive-through and got his coffee while doing so, then parked the car in the lot and called a tow. To tow it back home, instead of the gas station across the street. No, he did not get any gas that day. He waited until his dad got off work to bring a three-gallon jug of gasoline because I refused to enable that shit. Three, how do oil companies know where to build gas stations? She thought that there was a gasoline bubble underground that they would tap into and run a line straight to the pump. She was working for Chevron. Four, she thought that islands float. Five, when he asked my grandmother if she'd ever had children. Six, I was having bad cramps and I took an Advil. My ex told me I shouldn't take them because it's a gazebo. Seven, she seemed to be confused about the difference between flamingos and penguins. But insisted they weren't real because she'd grown up in Alaska and never seen any. Eight, he played a lot of cotton got a tattoo based on a cool design he saw in the game. It was the Nazi eagle. Nine, I told him I had to leave in one and a half hours. He told me that was oddly specific and I should have rounded up to two hours instead of one hour and 50 minutes. I clarified that I had to leave in one hour and 30 minutes and he said that's actually 1.3 hours. Ten, her. Look at the moon. That ain't right. Me, what do you mean? Her. You're not supposed to see the moon during the daytime. The government put that there to spy on us. Me, what? Eleven, I was going into anaphylactic shock at a restaurant due to unknown allergy. My throat was closing and I had no neck due to swelling. He asked if I wanted to go outside to get some air. We were sitting on the patio. Twelve, he insisted that Spain was in South America because they spoke Spanish.