Poker face #fyp #viral #poker #face #practice

He tickled my balls so I sewed his nuts to his mom's asshole. Okay, so before anyone judges me, just know this man earned every single stitch. A few weeks ago, my roommate Jake thought it would be hilarious to sneak up on me while I was napping on the couch and tickle my balls. Not just a poke, not just a light tap. This man went full-gremlin mode and thought he was funny. I wake up nearly kick him in the jaw and he's laughing like a hyena saying, "Chill, bro, it's just a joke." Nah, I don't chill. I plot, so I waited. I bided my time. I watched him, studied his habits like I was prepping for a National Geographic Documentary. Fast forward to last night. He passed out drunk on the couch, perfect opportunity. I grabbed my sewing kit. Yes, I sew, don't judge me. And decided to take his little ball-tickle prank to the next level. I carefully, very carefully, tied his nuts with a thin surgical thread. Then I extended that thread all the way to his mom's room. She lives next door, don't ask. It's a long story where she was sleeping on her side. And, well, let's just say I connected things. The next morning, Jake wakes up screaming. His mom wakes up screaming. The thread pulled tight, chaos, screaming, cursing, tears. I have never laughed harder in my life. Now Jake won't even look me in the eye. His mom moved out. And the best part? Nobody has touched my ball since. Follow for more or your next. I'm talking about you behind the screen right now.