Here's what you can do to support them: The key is to support or ask for help in a way that doesn't feel overwhelming or exhausting for them. Here are some examples: - I was thinking of watching a new movie tonight, and I'd love your company. Do you mind if I come over with snacks? We can just relax and enjoy the it together. - I'm trying out different tea blends and could really use your help to choose the best one. Want to join me for a tea tasting session? - There’s a new cafe that opened up nearby, and I heard they have great coffee. Want to check it out with me? My treat! - It's a great evening for a drive. How about we just cruise around for a bit while listening to some good music? I can pick you up in an hour! Keep in mind that, sometimes, they might not be up to hosting at their place if they think it’s untidy, and going out might seem overwhelming if it requires a lot of preparation or too much energy. So opt for activities that are simple and enjoyable, things that won't drain their energy but will genuinely make them feel included and valued. This way, you offer support without adding pressure. I'm hosting a free live zoom event called "The Trauma You Can't Remember." You should come! Go to the link in my bio to sign up.
@matthiasjbarkerTranscript
don't text your depressed friends how you feeling today. They don't know what to say. They feel awful and then there's this guilt of still bad, still feeling sad. Well, have you tried exercising today? Do you want this? Do you want that? And it's like, I don't want to make any decisions. I don't want to have to explain how I'm feeling right now. I just want to be in my bed. And it's like the best thing you could do with some of these moments is just to show up with kind of almost a pre-planned way for there to be connection that doesn't require a lot of energy. Like, hey, can I just come over and make s'mores? It's weird to make s'mores by myself. I think it'd be kind of fun. I'd like to, you have that fireplace. I don't have a fireplace. Can I come over to your house and just make you s'mores? Can I just come make you dinner? That's what I'd like to do. We can just watch a movie. We don't have to talk. You don't have to explain how you're feeling. I just want to be with you. If someone can feel just the presence of you and your love without the pressure to have to explain or fix or change, that weirdly enough is like the magnetic force that starts to pull things in a different direction. So much depression is actually just loneliness with loss. So much depression is feeling aimless and hopeless and not knowing where to turn to next. And the thing that digs that wound even deeper is suggestions. Just be present with those that you love.
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