hit follow and lfg #externalanchors #externalregulation #nervoussystem #HealingJourney #triggered

If your mom triggers the fuck out of you, I bet you're also a people pleaser and I bet you also have people that you've got no contact with in your life and you still can't get them the fuck out of your head. You still think about them all the time. They still pop up on a random Tuesday. I bet you also have anxiety. I bet you also overthink everything that ever happens. I bet you have rejection sensitivity. I bet you have severe depressive episodes that take you months to recover from. I bet you have a tough time in groups of friends and groups of girlfriends. I bet you struggle with hypervigilance. I bet you can't hold the boundary to save your life. I bet most of these things are true because what's happening is you are extremely externally anchored. You have anchors in the people around you and acceptance and approval and being right and being understood and being seen the way you want to be seen. And that causes you to try and manage all of these anchors at all times because you don't have an internal anchor to produce your own okness, your own nervous system regulation. So in order to feel relief or regulation, you have to check all your anchors. Make sure they're all stable at which never happens. And the moment they're all stable, then you have to go through and check them all again because it's only temporary regulation that you have to keep checking. So the person that you went no contact with that keeps popping up in your head is an anchor and you have to keep checking it because your nervous system never got the memo. I don't want to think about them anymore. I don't want to talk to them. I don't want to even be connected to them. But your nervous system is like, no, that's where we find relief. I have to go back. I have to check to make sure they accept you. I have to check to make sure that people still think we're productive. I have to check all these things because you don't have any self-trust or self-regulation to move from here. And what happens is when we're externally anchored like that, we also are out of touch with our intuition, we're out of touch with what we're truly supposed to be doing in this life, we're out of touch with what we actually want. And that's why you're so many women being like, I don't even know what I want. Yeah, of course you don't know what you want because you've only ever managed everybody and everything outside of you. You don't have time to listen to your gut, to your knowing, to your intuition. You've never even connected to it because all you do is check everything outside of you. Oh, do you want to know how I know this? This is a wildly common experience. You are not alone. I lived this. But I also figured out how to fix it. So if you want to fix it, follow along because that's what we're doing here.