Make your choice. Just own it. You chose to have 7 dogs and 3 cats. You chose to take out $100k in student loans for a degree that pays $40k. You chose to have kids with multiple partners without exit clauses in the custody agreements. Those were all choices. Not accidents. Not things that happened TO you. Choices YOU made. And now those choices have consequences. One of those consequences is that moving abroad is exponentially harder for you than for someone who made different choices. That's not unfair. That's just cause and effect. You can accept the extra work required to overcome those barriers. Pay the pet relocation fees. Hire lawyers for custody battles. Aggressively pay down debt before moving. Or you can simplify. Re-home some pets. Wait until kids turn 18. File bankruptcy and start fresh. Or you can accept that moving abroad isn't happening right now given your current circumstances. All three options are valid. What's NOT valid is complaining that the system should accommodate your specific complicated situation without you doing extra work. Link in bio when you're ready to own your choices and figure out what comes next. ๐๐บ๐ธ #CreatorSearchInsights #TikTokCreatorSearchInsightsIncentive
@nomadveronicaTranscript
I'm going to say something that you're not going to like. Some people have made choices in their life that make moving abroad extremely difficult. And while I have compassion for those situations, I'm not going to pretend that the barriers that you're facing aren't mostly self-created. This isn't about judging your choices. You probably made decisions that made sense at the time, but those decisions now have consequences. And one of those consequences is that moving abroad is now significantly harder for you than it is for other people. You can either accept the extra work that it's going to take you to move abroad or find the extra money that you're going to need to solve the problems that you've already created to move abroad, or you can not. And you can just decide that now is not the time to move abroad because of the decisions you've already made. But what you can't do is blame the system for the consequences of the choices that you made. If you chose to have multiple different custody arrangements with different parenting partners, or you chose to get into a ton of student loan debt where the profession doesn't pay enough to pay back the student loans, or you chose to have 12 different pets, those all create mountains of difficulty. They're not unsolvable difficulties, but they will take a lot of extra work or money to solve those challenges. Now as a move abroad coach, I'm not going to sit here and pretend that every American is going to be able to move abroad. Sometimes there are just situations that you've created that make it impossible to move abroad. And that's just something that you're going to have to come to terms with. Or if you want to tell me to shove it and you want to find a way to solve that problem, then by all means there is probably a way to solve it that your pretending doesn't exist because it's extremely hard. It might be an extremely difficult conversation. It might be an extremely difficult choice. It might be creating a lot of extra money. But if you want to solve it, it's probably solvable. But nine times out of ten people are going to tell me, "This is what's stopping me." And I have no way to solve it. And if you say you can't solve it, you can't solve it.
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The life you've built in America isn't the life you wanted. It's the life you could scrape together under constraints of: wages that don't cover basics, healthcare tied to employment, housing costs consuming half your income, constant financial stress, survival mode as default state. You didn't choose misery. You chose best option available within impossible constraints. But those constraints are geographic. Change geography, change constraints, change what's possible. The apartment you can barely afford in America becomes the nice place with breathing room abroad. The paycheck that barely covers survival in America becomes the income that allows saving abroad. The constant stress about one emergency destroying you financially becomes manageable situation where emergencies are expensive but not catastrophic. Same income. Same skills. Same person. Different location. Completely different life. You're not stuck because you lack resources. You're stuck because resources you have don't work in location you're in. Move those resources to location where they work better, and you're not stuck anymore. But moving requires: tolerating uncertainty about how things will work out, being uncomfortable while figuring out new systems, releasing familiar patterns even when familiar is miserable, trusting you can build better life from scratch. Most people choose familiar misery over unfamiliar uncertainty. Devil you know feels safer than devil you don't, even when devil you know is grinding you down. This is why people stay in: jobs they hate, relationships that don't work, locations that don't serve them, lives that feel like slow suffocation. Because at least they know how to survive current misery. Unknown is terrifying even when unknown might be better. But what if you're not choosing between misery and uncertainty? What if you're choosing between: familiar misery that will continue indefinitely, or temporary uncertainty that leads to actually building life you want? When you're in survival mode, you're making choices based on: what's cheapest, what's fastest, what gets you through next month, what keeps crisis at bay. Not what you actually want. What you can manage given constraints. Those choices compound into life that doesn't reflect your preferences. Reflects what you could piece together while drowning. But when you move somewhere your income works better, you're not in survival mode anymore. You have breathing room to choose based on: what you actually want, what serves your family, what creates life you're proud of. That's not small difference. That's the difference between life you're enduring and life you're choosing. Living in America isn't default you're stuck with. It's choice you're making every day by not choosing differently. And choosing differently is available to you. Link in bio for people ready to choose. What would you choose if survival wasn't consuming all your energy? ๐๐บ๐ธ