I feel sorry for who I am.... #Minecraft #venting #relatable #deep #fyp

Sometimes I sit there and this really heavy thought shows up in my head. And it's the feeling that the people around me would probably have had an easier life if I just didn't exist. Or I was a different person. Because when I look at myself honestly, I keep seeing all the ways I failed them. I think about my family and how they spent years hoping I would become something that makes them proud. And instead, I feel like I'm just the sun who never really became anything worth talking about. I think about my friends and the moments I should have been there, the moments someone needed me. And somehow I still manage to disappear or say the wrong thing or show up too late. And then I think about the people who tried to love me and how many good things I somehow ruined just by being the way I am. Like I start something good and then little by little, I mess it up without even meaning to. And the worst feeling is realizing it's not just one mistake. It feels like a pattern, like wherever I go, I eventually become the problem. And after a while, you stop blaming bad luck or bad timing and you start looking at yourself. Like maybe this is just who I am. Maybe I'm just the kind of person who disappoints people without trying to. And that thought sits with me longer than I want to admit because it makes you question something really painful. Which is the possibility that the people in your life deserve someone better than you. And somehow they just ended up with me instead. And sometimes, that makes me feel sorry just for existing at all.